Hero's fall
by wolfypuppypiles
Summary: SPOILERS Barry's thoughts while giving up his speed in 2x18 and a little change on what happens afterwards.
1. Chapter 1

Barry's speed was like blood to him. Essential, primal, vital. The Speed Force was embedded in his DNA, written into the fabric of his being. Barry could not be Barry without his speed. The hero knew that he would no longer be satisfied with being just an ordinary CSI or an ordinary citizen. Barry could never be happy with being anything but the Flash.

When Barry ran, off to save people or just to get to work on time, he felt the energy of the lightning bolt crackling under his skin. He could feel it burning through his veins, flickering like his soul itself as he ran. The Speed Force is an immense and endless energy that could never be harnessed or owned, and Barry loved it with everything he had.

But when the choice was given to him, Wally's life in exchange for his speed, Barry didn't even hesitate. In his earlier day's as a hero Barry may have begged to exchange something else or insist that there had to be another way but the speedster knew there would be no bargaining with Zoom. Zoom wanted his speed and would happily kill anyone that opposed him; and so Barry didn't oppose.

It was agony how close Barry had been to stopping Zoom. He had increased his speed, finally faster than Zoom, only to have to give it all to the inhuman monster. Zoom would be faster than he ever was before and Barry wouldn't be able to outrun an ordinary man.

But he did not hesitate. He would keep Zoom from hurting his family. They would be safe.

Barry stepped onto the treadmill, his heart sinking at the realization that this was it. He was giving up his speed. Zoom would win. Pushing the smug face of Hunter Zoloman from his mind Barry thought instead of his family. He didn't know how long they would be safe from Zoom once he did this. Would Zoom go back to his own world? Surely once he had The Flash's speed he would be satisfied and go home. But there was always the chance that he would stay and kill them all anyway.

Barry swallowed his trepidation and started moving, feet flying across the treadmill as he pulled speed from the lightening within himself. He ran, his super speed creating flickers of lightening, sparking around him, and almost wanted to cry at the knowledge that this would be the last time he could use his speed.

Barry wanted to live in that moment as his legs flew and his arms pumped at his sides, energy soaring through him and power surging through every cell in his body. But Harrison's device began to pull the speed from the speedster, the energy of the Speed Force being torn from him, to give to Zoom. Barry could feel his power draining, his cells emptying of everything that made him special, the lightening dancing over him, heating his skin like a last goodbye.

Barry could feel his limbs growing heavier as the last of his speed was stolen, his legs stiffening and wobbling like jelly all at once as he tripped over his own feet on the treadmill. He was covered in sweat and his skin buzzed all over like pins and needles. His breathing was strained and his chest burned as his feet finally slipped on the slowing treadmill, sending him tumbling to the ground.

There was a yell, Iris calling name, and Barry blinked tiredly up at her from the floor as she leaned over him.

"Barry are you okay?"

He was panting and placed a hand on Iris' knee to keep from falling back to the floor.

"Yeah, I'm okay." Though how could he be? He just gave up his powers to a monster.

Zoom injected himself with the vial of lightening and screamed in elation as power surged through him, rippling across his black suit like a living thunder storm. A streak of blue lightning fired across the room with a crash like thunder as the speedster gripped Barry around the throat, squeezing so hard the hero began to choke.

There were screams but Barry couldn't tell who they were from, couldn't concentrate on anything except his need to breathe. Hunter's hand was crushing his windpipe and Barry's vision was swirling with black as his exhaustion and lack of oxygen threatened to send him tumbling into unconsciousness.

Someone was pleading with Zoom, Barry thought it might have been Caitlin, her strained voice fighting back tears as she begged the serial killer to spare The Flash's life. Barry's eyes squinted open, his mouth gaping in his seizing lungs search for air, and from the corner of his eye he could see everyone staring with different hues of horror.

Barry's hands were still fumbling weakly at Zoom's arm where it gripped his throat and held him to the wall. He had been held like this before, when Zoom had almost killed him; funny, how things aligned themselves. This time Barry could see Hunters face and saw the hesitation there. It wasn't because he had any reservations about killing another human being, Barry knew the man felt nothing akin to remorse when he ended people's lives with his clawed hands, it was because of what Cisco was saying.

"Let him go and I'll open a hole to your world. You can go home, there's nothing more to take here, just let him live. Please."

Barry mentally begged Zoom to agree with Cisco, his vision almost completely black now, his limp hands slipping from Zooms arm. And then he was hitting the floor, sucking in as big a breaths as he could through his damaged wind pipe, stars bursting in front of his eyes as oxygen returned to his air starved brain. Then a crackle of lightning and thunderous boom filled the room as streaks of blue shot out of the lab, Cisco disappearing with Zoom.

Barry felt hands on him and could hear Iris and Caitlin calling his name but all he could do was cough and drag in air as he shook on the ground. Zoom had won. He was going back to Earth Two where he could terrorize and murder as he liked. He was gone. And so was The Flash's speed.

(I don't like the fact that the writers of the show are happily ignoring the fact that when Wells took 2% of Barry's speed he got sick but when all of it was taken he was fine so idk i might do that in the next chapter if you guys want let me know what you think or just come talk about the episode cause damn) 


	2. Chapter 2

Barry's mind was screaming at him to run after Zoom and get Cisco back but he could barely move at all from where he lay shaking on the floor. His vision was harshly blurred and his head spun, making him so dizzy he felt as if he were at sea during a storm, lifting and falling on crashing waves, about to tip over at any moment.

The hero scrunched his eyes shut against the sharp lights of the lab but he could feel the light stabbing through his eyelids. He groaned as a hard shiver rolled through him, and suddenly became aware of the hands on his goose-bumped skin, their voices piercing the air with their concerned tones.

"Barry can you hear me? I need you to try and slow your breathing, you're going into shock."

"Caitlin? I don't feel good."

Her hand was on his shoulder, gently but sternly trying to flatten him on the ground as he instinctively curled in on himself.

"I know but you'll be okay, just keep breathing and try to stay awake."

Barry squinted his eyes open to look at the Doctor as she leaned over him and saw that Iris was there too. Caitlin turned to the other girl and started giving instructions, her voice calm and decisive, making Barry feel instantly better. Caitlin knew what to do, shed take care of him, she always does.

"We need to set up some IV's and get some fluids and sugar into him. Go get the bed and find some blankets if you can, he's shaking so badly I don't think he's going to be able to get there on his own."

Barry thought he should have been ashamed, shaking on the floor of the cortex in front of a girl he's had a crush on since childhood and a woman as smart as he was and far more beautiful, but he was so glad that they were there to take care of him. He felt awful; his heart thumping hard in his chest as he shook uncontrollably and fought to stay conscious.

Iris darted away to follow Caitlin's instructions, leaving the Doctor to check the hero over. Her gentle hands taking his pulse, monitoring his breathing and temperature, all the while calming Barry and making him feel safe. She had a crease between her eyebrows as she concentrated and she was muttering things to herself.

When Iris came back, the familiar hospital bed in tow with extra blankets piled on top, Barry was almost curled into himself again. He was shaking so badly he thought he might rattle the beds screws out, and that was if he could get onto the bed in the first place. Caitlin lifted Barry's chin with a finger, demanding his attention.

"We're going to get you into bed okay?" She turned to Iris. "Take his other arm and put it around your shoulder we'll support his balance and weight so we can direct him into the bed alright?"

Iris nodded, helping Caitlin slowly sit Barry up and waiting for him to swallow his nausea before taking his arm around her shoulders. Caitlin did the same on Allen's other side, both woman holding his waist and waiting for him to get his shaky legs ready.

Barry's limbs felt so heavy and clumsy as they shook that it took almost all of his concentration just to get his feet under himself when they lifted. Once he was on his feet they shuffled over to the bed, mostly dragging him, before laying him down on the familiar mattress.

Iris immediately started pulling the blankets down, arranging Barry underneath them, tucking her best friend in as Caitlin pushed the bed to the small room with all her medical equipment.

Dr Snow was a whirlwind, in her element and in control as she set up machines, placing IV lines and hooking up monitors. Iris could do nothing but watch the woman work and hold Barry's hand, rubbing his trembling arm in an attempt to rid him of his goose-bumps.

Once everything was finished Caitlin took some blood samples and ran off to test them. Barry thought Iris might have been saying to him but after all the days excitement he simply had no energy left to listen and he let his eyelids fall shut as unconsciousness swallowed him whole.

….

Caitlin had taken so much blood the past few days that Barry thought he might actually run out. She was testing and retesting his cells and his DNA, trying to figure out what happened and how his body was adjusting to his sudden loss of powers.

Barry hated being without his powers. He felt weak and tired and stupidly human without them. Being at S.T.A.R Labs didn't help, his Flash suit sitting mockingly in front of him and Cisco's monitors going off with crime alerts, all reminding him of what he had lost.

Cisco had come back, Zoom having released him once the breach was open to his home world, and Barry was glad he was okay. At least there were a few things to celebrate. Zoom left, Cisco's back, Wally's safe. Barry made the list in his head when his thoughts got particularly sulky but after a few days repeating the same short list he had begun failing to see the accomplishment in what he had done.

Joe kept reminding him that he had saved Wally's life, something he could never thank him enough for, and that he still had a job to do at the CCPD.

"You still save people Barry, you just don't have to wear a mask when you do it." Sure, Barry thought, catching someone's murderer was all well and good but it didn't stop them from being dead. He wasn't saving anybody, he was just cleaning the mess up afterward.

Barry used to love his job but there was just no comparing it to being the Flash. So when the S.T.A.R Labs monitors picked up a robbery in progress Barry couldn't help but put on his Flash suit and go intervene.

He knew he should leave it to the police but he was fairly sure it was a meta-human and there wasn't much they could do about a woman that could cause earthquake like tremors. So, ignoring the Joe sounding voice in his head telling him not to be stupid, the hero left.

Taking a taxi to the bank being robbed was embarrassing but Barry forged ahead, crashing through the doors of the bank with a bang. There were already police outside, with thankfully no sign of Joe, and they looked pleased to see the Flash. Barry just hoped no one noticed his lack of lightning and less than grand entrance.

The meta human looked towards Barry as he came in, snarling and throwing her bags of stolen cash to the floor with a grunt. Taking a quick look around Barry saw cracks in the floor and walls and there was a group of terrified hostages huddled together, hands tied behind them.

"Well damn. I thought you might have disappeared or died and wouldn't be here to stop me. No one's seen you in a bit Flash and I have to say I'm not that happy to see you."

Barry opened his mouth to reply but was interrupted when the com system crackled to life in his ear, a panicked voice on the other end.

"Barry what the hell do you think you're doing?!" Cisco sounded panicked and Barry could hear someone else yelling in the background.

Barry muttered back to his friend, looking up at a now confused Meta human.

"Now's not really the best time buddy."

"She could kill you Barry! Get out of there, there's nothing you can do to stop her just let the police handle it. Joe's almost there with The Boot he can-"

Barry interrupted, shaking his head and starting towards the waiting criminal in front of him.

"I can do this Cisco. Just like I have a hundred times before."

Cisco continued to shout into the coms but Barry ignored it, running at the Meta as she smiled.

Quake, as Barry was sure Cisco would name her, flung her hands out and Barry watched as the air rippled, like waves of heat coming towards him. In that moment, being faced with powers as strong and uncontrollable as an earthquake, Barry longed for his powers. He was desperately empty of the speed force and he could do nothing but cry out in pain as the waves of force crashed into him and flung him to a nearby wall.

Quake laughed as Barry smacked against the unforgiving stone, crumpling to the floor and curling in on himself as he felt his bones break.

"Well, if I had known it would be this easy I would have started robbing banks a lot sooner. You're not going to fight back Flash? Just gonna lay there and give up? That's a good idea. I'll just take my things and go. Maybe I'll take a hostage or two as insurance that you won't follow me. If you do I'll turn every bone in their body to dust, how about that huh? That sound like fun?"

She turned her back on him, not at all worried about what he could do while her back was turned, and picked up her bags of cash. Barry groaned and bit his lip, trying to get back on his feet to face her. His arm felt broken and his ribs were crunching when he moved, definitely a bad sign, making it hard to breathe. But he would not be deterred. Shakily, the hero go to his feet, locking his knees to keep himself standing.

He didn't really know what he was going to do to stop her but he could at least distract her, keep her occupied till Joe came. He couldn't let her hurt or take any of the innocent people here.

"How about we go another round. Give me another chance to knock you on your ass."

The Meta sighed, moving away from the hostages and turning around with a smirk.

"That does sound like fun. When you first showed up I was worried about you stopping me but this is just too easy. I'm starting to think you haven't got any powers at all. I haven't seen one flicker of lightning on you and you since you got here and you haven't used your speed yet."

Barry faked a smile, praying Joe would get here soon.

"Maybe I wanted to give myself a challenge. It'd be too easy to take you down with my speed."

Quake tilted her head and frowned, pretending to be thinking about it.

"No I don't think so. I don't think you have your speed at all."

She flung her hands out again throwing another wall of rippling air at him and Barry could only brace himself before it hit him. The waves flung him off his feet and sent him to the floor again, cracking his head against the stone, sending him tumbling into blackness.

Joe got to the bank in time to see the Meta knock Barry out, the boy lying crumpled and still on the ground. The detective set his jaw and fired The Boot, watching the metal cuff clamp around Quake's leg and securing her to the floor. She screamed in anger and tried to use her powers to take it off but it stayed put, much to Joe's relief.

Dropping the peculiar gun, Joe ran to his son's side and placed two shaking fingers to the boy's wrist, fingers finding the gap between the suit and gloves in order to do so. He sighed in relief at the thumping pulse and took out his phone. Cisco picked up on the first ring.

"The Meta's been booted but Barry's hurt. I can't tell how badly but he's unconscious, and I think his arm might be broken." The limb was crooked, a slight bend in the middle that made Joe want to throw up.

"Yeah his suits sending back his vitals and they don't look too good. I'll bring Caitlin with the van just let the police take the Meta and try to keep everyone away from Barry."

Joe could hear Caitlin in the background, saying something about a head injury, before Cisco's voice came back over the line.

"Oh and you probably shouldn't move him."

(dont worry I will be doing the sick thing in the next chapter its just hard to explain and write about cause duh im not a doctor or a scientist so its a little hard to find an explanation that works while trying ti think of something that will fix it all.)


End file.
